FACE 9: THIS IS BETWEEN YOU AND ME Now, you have won my trust. I’m going to give you a tiny box. I want you to take this box into a mysterious cave, and place it on a dais, or plinth. If you are there at the prescribed time, a shaft of sunlight will enter … Read more
FACE 1: YES, I’M JIMMY CARR You’ve got me, governor – I’m the Jimmy Carr you’re looking for. How did you find me on top of this vibrating neon podium? Sorry I couldn’t bring myself to reduce the word “governor” to “guv’nor”, by the way. The thing is, I’m not a moronic commoner who drops … Read more
What can we try to make Jimmy Carr look at today? Can any of God’s sweet wonder warrant the tiniest glimpse from Britain’s most self-regarding TV personality?
Jimmy Carr, eh! Never looks at anything, does he? Jimmy! London’s on fire, over there! Look at London, all on fire! Is he looking? Of course not. Jimmy Carr hasn’t voluntarily looked at anything since infancy, when he realised that seeing things filled him with a burning sense of scorn. “God, everything’s so feeble,” he … Read more