November 2005's Sign Of The Month

Medico-Educational Category Runner-Up “OPEN UP TO MOUTH CANCER” You and mouth cancer are like a couple of bloody children. Look at you both sitting there with your arms folded, not looking at each other. Isn’t it time you put your differences aside? Open up to mouth cancer. This touchy-feely approach to localised cancers is to … Read more


Apparently there’s a code of mutual respect amongst tattooed people; you don’t look at another man’s tattoos, wince in disbelief and say “what the fuck were you thinking, man? That’s not gonna come off, you know! You do know that, right? Everyone knows that. For fuck’s sake! Why didn’t you just cut your dick off … Read more

Men! Tchoch! Get Me Started!

Men! What a bunch of fuckers we are. We sit there, in our armchairs (armthrones, more like), drinking malt whiskies and thumping our fists on the table until boiled hams fly into our mouths, as if by magic. Only it’s not magic, is it girls? No! It’s your tireless work that keeps the whisky flowing, … Read more

Young Man, You Are Damned Forever

Walking along the road, I found a crumpled piece of paper hugging the railings. I’m curious, and like finding things, so I picked it up. What I found outraged me on so many levels that I quite literally fell over and refused to move for three days. Here, look. It doesn’t take much intelligence to … Read more